It MAY Workout

So, I'm trying to figure out if fitness as a lifestyle is addictive, or if I might just have a slightly addictive personality anyway and this is my new addiction. Maybe it's both. It's like the more you try, the more you want to try. I was actually really sad I didn't get to go to the gym today. We re-arranged Will's room because he got a new TV so I spent most of the afternoon vacuuming the floor with a hand vac and helping move furniture. lol. I burned a good amount of calories just not the way I wanted to do it.

I think the more I teach my body, the more it wants to learn. It's like my brain usually is, a black hole of curiosity. "Oh, I like this, what else can we do?" I picked up Yoga MUCH faster than I expected but enjoy it just as much as I thought I would. I want to try belly dancing and get back into pilates and like a dozen other things that I've seen or heard of and want to know more. I'm a completely new person, unafraid of these "skinny girl" things even if I might be slightly apprehensive at first. 

I want to do this 30-day squat challenge I heard of on facebook. I think I need to alter(for now) my approach to strength training. I've been following the advice of my boyfriend, who has his own significant weight loss story that he achieved just by reading body building forums. But this approach, obviously, is mostly about weight-lifting and muscle gain. It has worked so far because the muscle I have gained has helped melt the fat on top of it. But now that I have a pretty strong base to work off of, I really want to focus on slimming down and keeping that muscle toned. 

It's like when you see those pictures of "Half their size!" and you're like "How was that beautiful skinny person hiding in that big fat person?". I can see the skinny person under there now. Before it took a LOT of imagination, but now I can clearly see her in there under that fat and extra skin. I want to let her free!! So, here's my new work out plan for the month of May: 

-On May 1st I'm going to start the 30-day squat challenge. I would LOVE if any of y'all want to do it with me! I got the idea from my friend and I wish I had started it with her. 

-Protein shake for breakfast every day. My goal is to really up my protein intake so I can maintain as much muscle as possible. Because...

-Cardio at every work out. Right now I let myself slack on cardio to like once or twice a week outside my classes. No more. I will do cardio every time I walk through those doors.

These are my main goals. I want to keep slimming down but at this point my muscles are growing enough that it's making my legs look bulky. But I'm down to a 16 pant and a L top so I'm pretty happy lately. I posted a picture from today on my facebook page if you didn't see it. NSV for real with my boyfriend telling me "You look like you don't have a stomach, you look fantastic!" haha. These are the things that keep me going! 

Fat Marissa comes out to play, but Skinny Marissa is here to stay!

So I let fat Marissa come out to play Saturday at a drunken wedding and I didn't lock her back up until Monday afternoon. haha. Seriously though taking 3 days in a row off working out and letting myself eat whatever I wanted resulted in gaining like 4 pounds! So, small step back but it's good to know how quickly I can undo so much of my hard work. Also, I don't think I've mentioned that I have gallstones.

So, for roughly the last year I've been having bouts of nausea and back pain after eating super fatty foods, especially dairy fat. I found out it was gallstones last summer but the attacks are so infrequent I don't want to do surgery. Anyway, I've pretty much cut dairy fat out of my diet as much as possible. I'm lactose-intolerant anyway so it wasn't THAT hard. Especially when I know that eating queso might result in hours of agony. So  every 3 weeks we have a patient that comes in and brings donuts. Fat Marissa was ALMOST back in her cage but she slipped back out for a 2nd donut, which resulted in me getting sick halfway through choir practice and laying in bed for hours. So, yeah. Don't get gallstones. It sucks.

Even with the residual soreness, I got back on it hard last night with Zumba and then gave myself a mini spin class. I haven't been able to make it to spin in a couple weeks and the gyms have gotten new bikes so I went and played on one for a while. It was great! The new bikes count your calories burned and how fast you're peddling and how far you've gone, so cool! The sauna at the gym has been messed up lately so the heat I've come to savor after a hard workout was about 60 degrees less[a mere 120, lol] than it usually is and I was sad. Something about that intense heat relaxing all those muscles you just punished is really relaxing once you get used to it. If you're doing hard work outs and your gym has a sauna, I definitely recommend trying it. Though as accounted by my post roughly a year ago, saunas can get awkward fairly quickly. Now I walk in empty-handed in my socks and If i'm by myself I take off my shirt and lay on top of it, which is also apparently socially acceptable. I also like to use my exercise towel to cover my face. Serves dual purpose of  being able to ignore everyone else, and protecting my lungs from the super-hot air.

Anywho, I promised y'all pictures and pictures you shall have. Again, this is what I've pretty much established as my "before" picture:

April 2010

And this is my April 2013 picture:

April 2013

Sorority pose in full effect, y'all. It's pretty much permanent and I can't really help it. haha Fairly certain 2 of those grapefruits came from my chin. =) I was back on campus and tried taking a picture in that exact spot from 3 years ago, but everything has grown so much and it was muddy and I didn't want to make Will get his dress shoes dirty sooo yeah that was a fail. haha. Maybe I'll try again later, I'm sure I'll be back on campus for another wedding eventually.

This is a really random post but I guess that's what I get for skipping a week and getting sick and having lots to say. I apologize! I might actually do another post Friday because I want to talk about how I'm going to make changes to my current workout routine. Not Zumba or Yoga though, because I'm still loving those. Did Yoga again today and was shocked to be in the top performing half of the class. We had a lot of beginners[like i'm not?] and this one girl was totally unaware of her body and what "straight line" meant. The instructor was trying to help her so she didn't hurt herself but then she gave up when she realized that it was a lost short-term cause. It was gonna take a personal training session in a mirrored box to get her aware of what she was doing.

There was also a fairly obese woman that came in late and only participated in about half the class. I was impressed with the instructor and how she gave her personal attention[without disrupting class] and had her just do some ab work when we were doing stuff that she wasn't flexible enough to do. She just watched a good bit of what we were doing and I talked to her after class and she said she'd be back next week and I assured her I would as well. My Zumba friend that I've been missing was back last night, too! She'd been gone for like a month and she said she was in a car accident! I'm glad she's back and feeling better. We were both moving slowly last night because she was still recovering from that and I was still recovering from my gallbladder attack. I like making friends at the gym, even though Will thinks I talk too much. =) I think if you're gonna be doing the same class with people every week for the foreseeable future you should at least get on a smile-and-wave basis with them. haha

Thanks for reading, guys! Sorry about slacking last week, I will definitely post Friday about my upcoming slim-down regimen change. haha

Everybody Loves a Top 10 List!

aka the NSV post inspired by a huge victory on the scale. haha.

First, I just have to do this. So here is a different picture of the fat vs muscle density difference.

Grapefruits and Tangerines

So here is the representation of my 50+ pound victory so far.

50 lbs of fat = space of 30 grapefruits

I've lost over 30 grapefruits worth of fat. lol. That's pretty awesome. At my next big mark I'll go fill a basket with grapefruit or something. lol I dunno if Walmart would appreciate that.

SO, here are the Top 10 Non-Scale Victories associated with my big scale victory

10. Having officially completed two 5Ks and actually WANTING to run more.

9. Feeling full without finishing a meal. It's amazing how much your stomach shrinks when it doesn't have all those grapefruits up there encouraging it. haha

8. Doing a mile on the elliptical in 7:08. I have essentially cut my mile in HALF[not in real life, unfortunately] on the elliptical from where I started.

7. Being down 4 sizes from where I was. Size 24 pant to size 16. Almost able to shop at ITG stores!

6. Leg pressing more than I weigh and doing more than half my weight on the seated dip. How soon is too soon to strap myself into that thing? lol

5. My boyfriend's jackets being too big on me. I dunno about the rest of you fat girls, but I always wanted to be that girl wearing my boyfriends too-big letter jacket. Goal achieved.

4. Being able to touch my elbows to my knees when doing bicycle crunches. You have no idea how much this always bothered and shamed me before and now I have to be careful not to bruise my legs with my elbows.

3. Talking to women at the gym after classes and seeing their faces when I mention how much I've lost.

2. Being able to do compound abs! Such a huge victory for me!! Oh, and being able to hold a plank for over a minute! Big time, y'all.

1. Going to the doctor and hearing nothing but "You look great!", "Wow!", "I am SO proud of you." and "Keep it up!"

I still have a long way to go but I am one HUGE step closer to being where I want to be! Thanks to EVERYONE for all the love, support and endless encouragement! I also feel the need to "shout out" to Kacee aka Butterbean4283 for keeping me accountable on MFP and achieving her own 50lb weight loss! Yay! Guys, this is possible! I'm not the only one doing it and YOU can do it, too! I honestly have the "If I can do it, anyone can!" attitude about this. You just have to find your motivation. 

Ohhh Namaste...okay...

My arms are so sore. I think I understand now. When all of my friends were telling me about how awesome yoga was, they really did mean it in the same way all of my friends meant it when they told be about how great spin class was. If you find the right instructor it's so great it makes you want to zone out in a hot shower afterwards because you don't want to have to move. That kind of awesome...which for all of you that don't know, is the masochistic kind of awesome that the fitness-minded people like. It took me a long time to appreciate this kind of awesome. I still sometimes have trouble with it.

Except I think I've stopped having trouble understanding the awesomeness of Yoga because I tried it again this morning. It was a different teacher and it was a lot less "explore your inner self" and a lot more "make sure your right knee is pulling towards the 'clock wall'". MUCH more beginner friendly. After we had done a rotation a couple times and understood what she meant by each of the poses, she got up and walked around and corrected people and offered very specific, VERY helpful advice. I was shocked she never came to specifically correct me, but I did feel like I really understood each pose. My first class I had more of a "fake it till you make it" mentality because there were more people and less direction, and as long as I thought I mostly looked like what the instructor looked like it was okay. This time because there were less(7) people and the instructor was giving such specific directions I really felt like I could focus on each movement and pose and get the most out of it. "Think of it as you are between 2 panes of glass, or between the screen door and the front door" Why, yes, that actually helps me a lot to focus on being aligned properly in the correct "triangle" pose. haha.

It's hard to explain if you've never had a correction to your form in doing an exercise that instantly you felt the difference. We were doing one of the warrior poses and she told us exactly how to push our knee out and when I followed her instruction I INSTANTLY felt the difference in my inner thigh just as she was saying that you should feel it in your inner thigh. It's moments like that that really focus your workout because you know exactly what you're working and now you know how to engage it properly. It makes you feel like all your energy and effort are worth it. And she offered modification advice and really made you feel like it was okay if you had to modify, she wasn't going to judge you as inept or anything. "It's okay, this is really hard". [She actually said that]. We did a lot of warrior and side plank stuff, which we didn't do very much of in the Saturday class. So after class I talked to her and asked her if each class had a focus area. Basically we just talked about how the class worked and I told her it was only my second one. She seemed kind of surprised and told me I did great and she asked me about the Saturday class. We talked for a little bit about the different classes and the different gyms. I told her she'd definitely see me next week. haha.

So get excited, all you friends who wanted me to get into Yoga. I'm officially into it. I think this is what I need to get my upper arms and thighs slimmed down. I'm excited, too. Knowing that for probably 30-40 minutes I was doing poses that focused heavily on my current problem areas is really reassuring.

Also, quick couple words on other things: I am prying pound 50 off my body this week. I WILL. So hopefully by Friday I'll get to do that post I'm excited for. =) I might not have time for it though because I'm going back to my college town on Friday to run a 5K on Saturday! I'm really excited about it!! I was initially training to try to get a time on it but when I transferred to real life concrete instead of an elliptical I ended up giving myself tendonitis. I could've kept training in my ankle brace but I figured that was my body telling me I wasn't quite ready yet, and my sister and our friend are going to walk it anyway so I'll just walk with them. It's a color run, so I will definitely post pictures!! Also, if you want more pictures you can like the new facebook page I set up for my blog. I've been having trouble getting my blog updates to the people who want to read them, so I think I finally solved that problem. It also occurred to me that now that I'm 50 pounds down and on the right track to [eventually] get to my negative 100+ pound goal that strangers might also find me inspirational. haha. It's a really weird thing, to think of myself as inspirational, but y'all keep telling me things and eventually I'll believe it. haha. Like how I keep telling myself I don't need cookies and I've started believing it.

....

Although, in full disclosure I feel obligated to tell y'all: I did eat a slice of pizza for lunch, and later half of a cupcake and half a cake ball ...My sister made me do it! *sigh* It's ok, i'm only at 200 net calories for the day and I'm planning on having a very healthy dinner. And I am proud of myself for not having 2 slices of pizza and a full cupcake/cakeball like I easily could have and usually would have. It's the small things, guys. Baby steps, small victories- eventually they add up, trust me! It's my story, and I'm sticking to it. =)